Thirty-something speaks
Perception isn't always reality
Mike Maddock

When I was a kid, I used to think all my dad did at work was put his feet up on the desk and talk on the phone a lot. I'm not sure he's done anything to change that perception over the course of my lifetime, but I know now there was a little more involved to his job than comfort and pleasant conversation. Kids have a different perception of reality, but they're supposed to.

Innocence brings a certain pleasant aura to otherwise mundane or difficult circumstances. I'm glad I spent my childhood thinking my dad was enjoying a nice, cushy job. Not that he was miserable, but I didn't need the burden of knowing he spent a fair amount of his days as a city planner fighting crooked developers and patronizing city council members. My blissful ignorance and youthful perceptions let us all enjoy our days.

Now that I've been a parent a while I do realize my children's thoughts may not be quite as healthy as I believed my thoughts once were. If my children are correct, then once a person becomes an adult than that person is no longer subject to any rules or regulations and that person gets to boss kids around all day, every day. My kids think the fact I have a "squishy" belly is a good thing, and anything broken, warn out, or chewed up by the dog can simply be replaced by writing a check or using a debit card, or worse, Grandmama can just buy another one.

I wish life were that simple, and I wish I did actually take pleasure in bossing my kids around, but the fact is bossing them around is exhausting. It would be much easier in the short term to let them stay up for Letterman, eat pop tarts for dinner, and bathe only when the smell becomes too much for their own little noses to bear, but then I wouldn't be much of a parent.

I try to teach them the value of money without giving them the feel of having a house payment every month, but it's hard for them to grasp the concept that when the debit card is swiped there is actually an exchange of funds taking place. It's not just some magical device that lets us buy whatever we want.

The funny thing is a lot of kids would rather be doing what adults are doing and vice versa. I don't know how many times I've spent a perfectly lovely Saturday morning twisting and contorting myself under a bathroom sink cleaning out the mysterious sludge that's clogging our pipes, while telling my helpful children to leave me alone and go play. How many times have I told my two girls to quit talking and go to sleep, when it's me that actually wants to crawl up in bed and skip all my nighttime duties?

Adults perceive youth as a time of great freedom and fun, and kids perceive it as a time of captivity and useless chores. Perception is a funny thing and it's what leads adults to say youth is wasted on the young, and kids to say parents just don't understand.