Thirty-something speaks
Don't sweat the little things... unless your baby doll is missing
Mike Maddock
Editor's note: This column is being repeated because of popular demand.

Don't sweat the little things, simple, yet profound advice. However, those words of wisdom have absolutely no bearing on the lives of anyone under five years old. How can you not sweat the little things when that's all you've got? Is it so necessary to sleep with at least five babydolls, two teddy bears, and one very worn blanket? Is the world going to come to a screeching halt if the peanut butter is extra crunchy? Will the earth stop spinning on its axis if the Cinderella nightgown has to spin just this one night in the washing machine? Apparently it will.

When your world is comprised primarily of playschool, playtime, and playgrounds, the little things mean an awful lot to you. Kids don't have the distractions of work or house payments. They don't worry why the check- engine light keeps blinking on and off in the car. They don't care if you haven't had a decent night's sleep in over a month. Why? Because they are kids, and they shouldn't have to worry about all that stuff. My kids certainly don't. I have three children, the oldest being six, and I would never burden them with such things.

But at the same time, does that mean I have to worry where Lamby the three- inch stuffed sheep is at night- night time? Should I care that Buffy the doll is buried under two feet of Lincoln Logs, Little People, and various and assorted dress- up clothes and apparently will not make herself available for my four- year- old causing a melt- down the likes of which we haven't seen since that little incident in Chernobyl.

Unfortunately, it doesn't really matter how bad a day I had at work, the only important thing now is finding Lamby, Buffy, or whatever other plastic or stuffed doll happens to be missing from the aforementioned bedrooms.

Forget the war on terror, Daddy. Forget the recession and the upcoming election. I can't find Sun- bed Barbie!

I love my kids, but, seriously, I don't remember ever being this dramatic. OK. So I wouldn't leave the house in anything but my Planet of the Apes T- shirt and my cowboy boots. And so what if I wouldn't go to sleep unless GI Joe and the Six Million- Dollar Man were in the bed with me. Those guys were cool! Lamby doesn't have a machine gun, and you certainly can't roll back Buffy's rubber skin to see her bionic arm. I wasn't high- maintenance, not like my girls.

I actually would love my girls to have a Planet of the Apes uniform. At least dressing them would be a little easier. We can't step foot outside unless my oldest daughter, "Cinderella" is dressed for the ball. We could be going mud wrestling, and it would not matter. If the outfit doesn't have a sash and a matching hairbow, she isn't wearing it.

Thankfully we all grow out of this obsession with meaningless things. We mature and realize what actually is important in this world. The little things are just that - little things. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to go make sure all of my gear is ready to go mountain biking tomorrow.